Discernment & Influence on the Spiritual Path

Some of the most potent lessons in my life have come from ignoring my own discernment, or blindly outsourcing it to someone else, believing they absolutely must know better than me because \[insert literally any justification here\].

Wherever we seek guidance from, it’s useful to be aware that even the strongest intuition can get a little muddied with personal opinions, emotions or agendas — so subtle that their influence can go entirely undetected. It’s not necessarily malicious, but it might not be as flawlessly pure as we wish to believe.

After all, it’s notoriously hard to subdue the ego, free oneself from every single judgement and cleanse the depths of the hidden mind to pristine perfection. And even if that level of mastery over oneself is achieved, everyone still has to be human. Being authentically human involves embracing our idiosyncrasies and blind spots with a light touch. These are not failures; it’s just our nature.

There is no “perfection” on this earthly plane. At least not our idea of it. However, we don’t require perfection in order to live a beautiful, harmonious life.

Being deliberate about our influences

There’s a great distinction between a voice that merely holds strong conviction and one that reflects our own truth back to us without any filtering. The latter may feel quieter, less absolute, and sometimes even inconsistent because it honours the entire spectrum of human evolution.

A spiritually mature voice acknowledges that guidance appropriate for one individual may turn out to be a complete disaster if imposed on another, and that sometimes the best course of action is to refrain from giving such absolute guidance at all. The problem with too many “absolute truth” proclamations is that they’re rarely universal, and they run the risk of being misunderstood or morphed into dogma.

In my experience, even a silent presence can achieve a lot.

Spiritual maturity is also marked by a profound acceptance of people exactly at the stage they are in. Love can only shine in its purest state when we garner this level of acceptance for others, and for ourselves. It’s possible to hold acceptance and still not waver in our core values or compromise our boundaries.

Support offered from this space is a rare treasure. If we find a guide or teacher who can offer this and actually chooses to take on that role, then we may consider it a reciprocal spiritual relationship founded on trust.

For seekers without a formal teacher, it’s sensible to adopt whatever approach or technique is suited to our temperament, provided we can commit to it for its natural course. Not all techniques have the same potency, but none of them are invalid. A person with strong determination and sincerity can grow more from books alone than someone who is unable to imbibe real-time, loving guidance despite having continual access to it.

In the end, it’s got to be us. And that’s why it hurts.

The spiritual seeker’s journey is anything but rosy. There will be breakthrough moments where we feel a fresh burst of freedom and hope. There will be periods of bliss and utter contentment with life. But we will also need to face our shadows with courage — not to destroy them, but transmute them with love. In this process we may feel deep discomfort, since we are called to examine ourselves as honestly as we examine others.

Unfortunately, this is a part of the journey no one can skip.

It is, however, well worth the patience.

If we persist despite the challenges, we feel our souls stirring and our hearts being opened more than we ever thought possible. Any rigidity of mind will lessen its grip, creating spaciousness and calm.

In this spaciousness, we begin to heal. We begin to love ourselves again, and extend that love to all our brothers and sisters in the world.

We start feeling genuinely free for the first time: from our mental and emotional trappings, from guilt over our past, and anxiety over our future. We gain strength to navigate some of the most ruthless human conditions — including loneliness — a cursed pandemic of our age. I say this last one from lived experience of that state.

And though it’s undoubtedly valuable to have genuine guidance pointing the way in our increasingly distracted world, the ultimate Source of truth is within us, waiting to be heard.

In the end, we all have the ability to distill the most profound wisdom from every drop of our lives. All we need to do is find and steady that inner voice arising from our own peace.

Kiruthika Rajeswaran