The Energy of Boundaries & an Uninvited Visit from Osho

Boundaries.

We need ‘em. We don’t always keep ‘em.

In a world where sharing and potentially over-sharing is both common and expected in the name of transparency, I’ve often felt drawn to contemplating boundaries and what they mean to different people. It started off primarily as a reminder to myself, being someone who has, in the past, mistaken compliance for kindness. And unmitigated compliance can easily become a doorway to losing our power.

Even as a toddler, I was fiercely independent in my thinking and would speak out against anything I perceived as injustice, control or hypocrisy, often with zero filter. Now with a little maturity…the thinking remains rooted, but the expression has evolved. I’ve grown to realise that loving acceptance is one of the kindest things we can offer others — not for their behaviour, which can honestly be deplorable at times, but for the individual as a soul.

We may not find any familiarity with the way someone speaks, acts or thinks, and we don’t necessarily need to. Why absorb disrespect, manipulation or projections? These are among the many normal human shadows that we encounter on a regular basis, in ourselves and in others. Some are just more in touch with their shadows than their light, for now.

However, at the level of soul, we all stand equal. More than just equal actually, because there is only one consciousness that holds us all. As souls, we are the same. Yet, because we need to contend with the shadows of the “real world”, boundaries become practical safeguarding.

This doesn’t mean we have to set out to change anyone else or convince them to see our side. Boundaries work both ways: the sobering truth is that even the best of intentions can’t reach a heart that’s not open to receive. And we need to learn to be okay with that, because imposing our agenda on another only serves our own ego. What we can do is make choices for ourselves that uplift us to greater levels of peace and happiness, free from unwanted influence. And while we have the right to stand up for what we believe in, some of the most powerful actions can come from a place of consideration — from restraint.

Even the quietest, seemingly insignificant acts of defiance can establish powerful boundaries and bolster our spirit. It takes immense courage to step away or disengage from people or environments that feel harmful or extractive. For many people, this conversation may land close to home, quite literally.

We humans are biologically hardwired to be social, co-operative and interdependent. This is how communities and tribes cohere and survive. And this isn’t a bad thing by any means, or a model to reject. Meaningful connection can be truly beautiful, just not if it mutates into fear-based control, or worse.

Not an escape from life

While some boundaries are non-negotiable, we can soften other edges into more of an art form, rather than cold severance. For example, some people may thrive with a high level of social interaction and find it hard to be alone, whereas others find a friend in solitude and struggle with excessive socialising. I find myself in the second category, having a temperament naturally tuned to solitude and quiet, though some people who know me wouldn’t guess that! I have spent years pushing myself out of that comfort zone, sometimes more than necessary, only to come back to my natural self in the end.

In the moments I do socialise, I genuinely enjoy the company of friends and well-wishers. It can be a lot of fun: the uninhibited, rollicking, belly-laugh-until-it-hurts kind of fun. However, it’s returning to solitude that replenishes my energy, and provides inspiration for all creative ideas.

In this process, I’ve learnt that it’s a delicate balance between preserving our sovereignty and completely distancing ourselves from life. While others may have clear opinions about what we should be doing, only we can know our deep-seated needs. These are not selfish desires that blind us to the needs of others, but the innermost architecture that helps us flourish, and fulfil our true purpose in life. Those are the boundaries that we need to hold firm.

An uninvited visit from Osho

It was late 2023. At this point, it wasn’t unusual for me or my mum to have dreams and visions of various spiritual teachers, gurus and saints. They usually arrived to give blessings, and we would receive with gratitude. My mum in particular has had a few experiences where she’s seen their physical presence in the room, or felt a physical touch. These kinds of experiences can sound like fantasy, but they are more common than we might think. They cross the boundaries of our limited mental understanding, until it happens to us directly.

In any case, those visitations were energetic crossings that had been welcomed. But what if we don’t want it? There’s no phone we can put down, no number to block, no door to lock. Physical boundaries are already challenging to hold, but energetic boundaries are extremely tricky to navigate. Every thought and emotion contributes to the intricate web of energetic links we form with others, even if they aren’t in the body.

Other times, however, we might be the recipient of energy that we have not invited or allowed. It’s not even necessary that we know the one sending it. At the time of this incident, I knew little about Osho and hadn’t read any of his books, or watched more than a couple of his videos. I was loosely aware of the controversy surrounding him, but decided against making any absolute judgements with limited second-hand information. While I had a sincere appreciation for some of his wisdom, there wasn’t any deeper resonance. So when he appeared in my dream out of the blue, that was a genuine surprise — and I wasn’t sure I liked it.

In this dream, I found myself walking into a crowded hall of seated guests, all listening to Osho speak at the front. It would seem I was already late to the party and had interrupted the event. Good job, me.

Both the crowd and Osho seemed to have noticed the intruder, and they turned around. I could feel eyes on me as I took a random empty seat near the front. At this point, Osho decided to leave his stage and come over to me, taking a nearby seat.

He then proceeded to open an enormous book in front of me, pointing at various pages and asking me questions about them. These were strangely specific spiritual questions. Though I patiently answered them in turn, eventually the whole endeavour started to feel like a test.

Why was he here? What did he want? And what’s with the Spanish inquisition?

It’s worth noting that my disturbance and hesitation wasn’t unfounded. I had already been initiated into the yogic practice of Kriya yoga years earlier by Yogiraj Satgurunath Siddhanath, a Himalayan Master Yogi who taught me that everything can be done in silence. Since then, I’ve only deepened my connection to the heart and Spirit of that lineage, which is essentially Mahavatar Babaji. I was wary of external energetic interference, and didn’t feel that I had to be answerable to Osho’s relentless questioning.

Sensing my annoyance, Osho closed the book and got up and started laughing. He then tried reaching out to touch my forehead, perhaps to bless me, but my dream self was not pleased. For some reason, just as his finger barely touched my forehead, I swung my arm around to bat his arm away, and felt the tangible pressure of real physical contact. I was jolted awake with this sensation, finding my arm raised awkwardly, pointing towards an empty room.

This was no longer just a dream.

I simultaneously felt a searing hot, but not painful, heat rising up my spine. The next day a small lump had formed in the middle of my forehead, where he had touched it. It took a full two weeks for that blessing to clear.

Surely, Osho was laughing to himself, wherever he was.

While this little anecdote is rather light-hearted, there have been other instances where the energy was more sinister and real protection was needed. This taught me a valuable lesson about the importance of protecting our energetic boundaries: a helpful message for everyone, and especially for those who meditate or engage in any spiritual, therapeutic or healing practices where energy is easily exchanged.

We can get creative with this and develop a personal practice that suits our nature and schedule. This can include visualising protective light around us, chanting protective mantras, saying a protective prayer and cleansing our physical spaces consistently. In our quieter moments it’s useful to pay attention to any disturbances in our energetic field. Sometimes that inexplicable unease or restlessness might not be from our own psyche, but something that needs a swift, healthy boundary put in place.

And let’s remember that one of the most powerful boundaries we can set is so disarmingly simple that it’s routinely overlooked: saying no.

Kiruthika Rajeswaran